So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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