Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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