This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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