Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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