So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
