Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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