I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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