I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
