We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
