Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
