The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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