it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
