best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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