You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Drunk is a universal language darling
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
