i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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