dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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