i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
