haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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