Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
