Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
