On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
