margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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