Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
