Your face is a jimmy john
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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