she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize