I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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