Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I don't deserve a penis
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
