In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
