Its about making memories worth repressing
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
