Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
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