Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
That accounts for only three of the penises
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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