I want to have your abortion
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
