first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
