OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Randomize