Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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