This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize