Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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