Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
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