You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
