hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
