yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
