Three words: puerto rican gang bang
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
