i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
