I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize