on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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