Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
