So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
He is an equal opportunity slut.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
