So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
