At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize