Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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