hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
